Have you ever wanted to jump over the counter and beat someone senseless??? Well, that's what I felt like today. It would be handy if you could act like Call sometimes. Someone asks you to ring up their basket full of crap while your dinner is already an hour cold, you've got 4 or 5 people waiting for their meds, and that ignoramous someone wants a discount on the freaking orange juice... well, it's time to jump across the counter and beat them to a bloody pulp!!
So, I wonder how Call would have handled this to begin with.
Picture it: CALL THE PHARMACIST.
The evil person in question asks in a whiny voice, "Could you ring up this orange juice? It's supposed to be 50 percent off. They got a whole line of people up in front."
Call, who has been interrupted about 15 times while making up ONE prescrition -- between phone calls, more prescriptions coming in, and people asking him where the bathroom is -- is getting a little irritated. All he wants to do is have five minutes to eat his porkchop, but no one is letting him. It's gone cold about an hour ago.
Call, in his dirty pharmacy smock, answers, "Ringin' up orange juice gets me ... CRAZY."
"But I only got these few items. You're not busy back here."
Call's patience is wearing thin, especially when he sees a basket full of crap, not only just the orange juice in question.
Call's dirty look alone would the kill the man instantly. "Now, you're starting to irritate me."
A smart man would have backed off at that point, but the evil customer continues on. "But the line is huge up front."
This guy has no idea that Call is trying to saves lives in his pharmacy. Call gets a wild look in his eyes. He goes for the BIG gun under the counter, hops over the counter, and brutally pistol-whips him with the butt of his gun. Call takes the orange juice in question, dumps it over the man's head, and says, "Now ... let me discount that for you!"
Meanwhile, everybody who wants to ring their PETTY items up at the pharmacy now thinks it's a better idea to go up front and stand in line.
"What kind of pharmacist is he?" someone asks fearfully in the background.
"The kind that likes my dinner warm," Call snaps, throwing the orange lid at the speaker.
"Now, who's next?" Call asks.
OH! How I wish I could be like Call!!!
Thank you for your time. You are a wonderful and lovely audience.
March 2002